How is community management like motherhood?

My career is not unlike my home life. I am very passionate about both. In honor of Community Manager Appreciation Day (read more here), I have crafted this piece to illustrate how they are related.

In the beginning

Some people get together and create something special, something they are passionate about. Then after a gestational period (development), there is a birth (The community is born).

In the beginning, there is much nurturing as well as (in the best scenario) rapid growth. At first, there is much you have to do to care for and protect  this little one, hand holding, encouragement and nurturing (which is at its most intense).

At times, you will need to sense where the problem might be and respond with perhaps more than one solution. There are also times where your techniques, motives and choices will be challenged and questioned by people both inside and outside the fold. Much change and growth is seen in the first year.

Happy birthday! Your baby has turned One!

In the second year, you feel a bit more confident. You are willing to let this little one stand on its own two feet. To explore. But only because you have the data to do so, you have watched and measured the performance of this little one so far, and are ready to move forward.

And while you still have a strong hand in the development and direction, you are more willing to let go a little to see the personality and physical accomplishments come through on their own. There is a personality and a voice that emerges and you have a hand in the shaping of the direction of that personality and voice.

Beyond the second birthday.

As time goes on, you feel more confident about letting go a little more. Letting the independence come through while secretly still steering the ship. Offering encouragement, suggestions and often teaching the little one about new directions and ideas.

At this point, voice and personality have emerged. You are still the major influence in the life of this little one. You will always be teaching and sometimes, even learning yourself (you will always be learning). There will be times of stress and strife and you will find the role of referee distinctly in your court as well as the role of protector, which you have always played from the beginning.

And though different mothers/managers have different techniques, really our goal is the same: To raise smart, healthy, compassionate (and passionate) children who you are proud of.

(This could also say fatherhood or parenting, but I am specifically relating my personal position as community manager to my motherhood experiences)

Hungry like a wolf. Well… sometimes

In the middle of the day I can eat anything in sight. But don’t let me even smell food at night.

My best time for eating is between 10am and 3pm. Between those hours I am RAVENOUS. Seriously.. I could eat your arm if it was in front of me. Dinnertime? I usually eat something but I am very uncomfortable afterward. And forget about red meat, I can’t even think about it. We have been eating many vegetarian meals but have been having some chicken here and there.

Eating has never been a problem for me. I mean really.. I love food. I’m not a small girl with a small appetite.

So I am adapting. Eating differently. Smaller portions for sure because I just don’t have the stomach for it. I’m sure this is better for me anyway.

Besides my cravings for Cara Cara oranges and sweet breakfast cereal, one of the things I seem to want is buffalo chicken. Some times it is wings, some times it is simply chicken tenders in wing sauce (over some greens makes a nice buffalo chicken salad!).

My ‘wing sauce’ of choice? Moore’s.

I will say up front. I was not offered free product, I was not contacted by the company, I bought the bottle randomly at my neighborhood Stop N Shop.

But it is simply the best bottled buffalo sauce out there. Not too spicy (sorry all you spice fiends) but spicy enough. Alex likes them (he does like spicy food so don’t think it is mild enough for your child without tasting it yourself first).

So there is my current diet staple. Buffalo chicken.

During pregnancy.. how did your diet change?

Photo used with creative commons licensing from Flickr user esimpraim

An active pregnancy actually means you need to get off your ass

We are closing in on the last weeks of the first trimester. I will be happy to see the nausea and sickness go away (oh please, oh please, oh please). and my mind turns to other issues.

There are a couple things I want to avoid. Forced bed rest. Early delivery. Other health problems such as high blood pressure and gestational diabetes.

Seems simple, right? Maybe for someone younger and thinner.

I recently told someone on twitter that I was going to fight like hell to remain active and healthy. She told me I had a great attitude.

I have a confession to make. I haven’t done a thing about it.

Every day, I am exhausted and vomiting and fighting just to make it through the work day. The thought of being active at this time makes me want to shove a stick in my eye.

But I know it is important. And I promise I WILL DO IT. I think the getting started is the hard part. You know.. the getting my ass out of this chair part. Yeah, that. It needs to happen soon.

I think that adding 30 minutes of exercise a day in to my life would be extremely beneficial. And while caving to the cravings is one of the pregnancy bonuses, I’m going to have to watch it (bye bye Crunchberries) better. Although my obsession with Cara cara oranges is a good craving to have!

I need you guys though. I need your help. Your encouragement. Your ideas to keep me from getting bored on a treadmill. I need your favorite healthy snacks. I need you to sneak me some words on twitter. On Facebook. In my email.

I have always caved on the exercise thing. The food thing has always been hard. It is too important not to watch what I am eating and to get up off my ass now.

Did pregnancy change your attitudes about food and exercise? Tell me your stories.

What noone tells you: brushing your teeth

Photo by flickr user sgrace (creative commons)

There are already women out there laughing and shaking their heads just from reading that title.

For many women, not all, but I certainly know that I am not alone, brushing your teeth becomes interesting. And by interesting, you sometimes enter an endless circle of brush, gag and vomit.

I know some of you know. But this is one of those things that noone ever tells you happens. Well I am here to tell you.

IT HAPPENS

and you can’t help it, and some times it gets comical, but it is normal and you should not be worried. It is definitely happening to other pregnant women.

They just don’t talk about it.

First look: Maternity wear for plus-sized gals

1st pregnancy

Since Stefania already mentioned it in the comments of this post, I thought I’d dive right in.

When I was pregnant with Alex, there was not a lot to choose from. It was a struggle to find maternity wear, especially maternity wear that was work appropriate. There has been one significant new player to the game since then and an expansion of choices at the others so things are looking up for us.

Lets start with the new kid on the block. Old Navy has been a tried and true friend to our family for a long time. I was pleased as punch not only to see they carry plus-size maternity wear, but that their regularly sized maternity wear goes up to a size I can wear and expanded my choices. Their clothing is priced well and is comfortable. The clothing runs big but they have a generous return policy. As it is with all of their plus-sized clothing, purchasing and returns are all done online. So if you really need to try something on, this will not be for you.

The surprise for me? Motherhood Maternity. I was able to go to their store. They has a small supply of plus-size items in the store, but I found that when I tried them on, they were very big. I am not barely plus-sized either, I am firmly in the plus camp. The saleswoman suggested trying on an XL in their regular sizes and lo and behold.. it fit! The selection was great and I was able to try everything on. The quality of the clothing was strong and I was able to purchase some great additions to my wardrobe (including a yummy sweater that can certainly be worn postpartum).  When I went to the store last weekend, they were having a great sale. I was able to pick up 2 very full bags of items for just about $100. Some of these things were clearance summer items, but I will still be pregnant then! I highly recommend their merchandise.

Another choice out there is JC Penney. I think it depends on what store you go to, but although many of their plus-size items are marked as “Also in stores” they were NOT in my local store. In fact, there were NO larger sizes in stock and the associate I asked said “We dont carry anything like that here” and walked away. Rather rude. They have a decent online selection, so I would stick to that. I cant vouch for their quality and would buy from either of the above retail stores first.

Next up is Sears. Yes, I was surprised by this too but I was able to pick up some well prices, well made pieces in their store. This was another place where it was worth it to go in and try on some clothes. I discovered I can fit in to pants that I otherwise would not have purchased online.

Have not tried Kohl’s to see what they carry in-store but even online seems limited. Sizes go to XL and I’m not sure I know what that means yet. Is it an XL I can wear? Hard to tell.

And finally, call ahead to some consignment shops. I know that a couple of my local shops carry some pieces, but speak to them, perhaps they can help you keep an eye out for specific pieces you need for your wardrobe.

I have not tried the maternity spanx.. but I’m told they’re a dream! Will keep a look out for these for myself!

My advice on maternity wear in general is to get several key pieces and keep rotating them through. Some leggings and skirts/dresses go a long way as well as a good pair of black pants and a good pair of jeans.

Are there others that you are using out there? Who else is plus-size friendly for the expecting mom?