On being a mom

May 17, 2006

I think we are slowly getting the hang of it.. or at least surviving. I think I am starting to realize that babies just cry. Usually there is a reason and once I take care of it, the crying stops.. but sometimes there is just no reason and he cries… and that is starting to just be ok. When he looks at us with that cute little face and coos and smiles and laughs.. we dont even remember that he was crying.

Sometimes he sleeps for 5 1/2 hours.. and sometimes he doesnt. Dave and I are tired.. but we know that this wont last forever.. even when we are delerious, we have to try to remember that.

Alex is “playing” more. He kicks his legs and flails his arms and makes silly noises like he is exercising. I call it his “Froggie Kung-Fu” and he laughs at me when I do. I cant wait for him to really be able to play with us and enjoy his toys. I’m not even sure WHEN that is supposed to happen.

I dont know if there is supposed to be a schedule.. but Alex has his own schedule no matter what we do.. and his schedule always changes. I am learning that nothing is predictable but all that matters is that he’s happy. I just hope that he eventually will either let us put him into a schedule or falls into a more structured one. I shouldnt rush things.. I know that these times go by fast and before we know it he’ll be walking.. and then going to the prom.

I go back to work on May 30th (part time for 4 weeks, then I return to full time). I dont want to leave the little man, but I think it will be nice to have some consistant adult conversation. We found a nice lady who runs a family day care, all of her references check out, as does her Massachusetts licensing… I’m still nervous leaving him, but I think I would be nervous no matter what. I sure am going to miss him during the day.. I already know it is going to be hard.

It is finally not raining today after about a week of downpours. As soon as Alex wakes up from his nap, I am going to feed him, change him and run out the door with him into the sunshine for a nice long walk along the ocean with our friend Rita.

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